Hello lovelies! This weeks post, as you can tell from the title, concerns matters that may upset you so if you are not comfortable in discussing rape do not read this post.
I read the entire franchise of 'Fifty shades' when I was 17 and I have to say I was completely hooked. Everything about it intrigued me and I completely loved it. At that time I saw many people talking about rape related to the books and I used to defend 'Fifty Shades'. I couldn't see where they were coming from, Ana and Christian consented to each other and to me that was it. Rape didn't occur as there was consent involved, a very black and white issue, case closed, right? Wrong.
I'm not suggesting that every sexual occurrence in these books is rape, for me it only happens once throughout the novels. I re read the books recently as the second film is due to be released early next year and I wanted to revisit the story so I had it fresh in my mind for the movie. There is one point in the second book, 'Fifty Shades Darker', that made me feel deeply uncomfortable. *spoilers ahead*
Earlier in the evening Christian had allowed Ana to touch him for the first time, whilst asleep Christian has one of his nightmares and Ana rushes to him to comfort him. When he awakes Christian starts to initiate sex and Ana responds but then says 'Christian.... Stop. I can't do this'. She says this 'urgently' and even physically pushes him away from her. Christian responds by asking what's wrong but he doesn't stop his actions. He starts to kiss her neck and so Ana says 'No, please. I can't do this, not now. I need time, please.'. This is where it gets even more uncomfortable for me. At this point the reader can sense how desperate Ana is for Christian to stop what he's doing and he's already ignored this. Ana still doesn't want to have sex and so Christian emotionally manipulates her into having sex with him. Up until this day Ana hasn't been allowed to touch him and Christian knows how much she wants to. So Christian asks Ana to touch him whilst they have sex. Christian uses this to manipulate her into having sex with him; she clearly did not want to enter into intercourse with him before this point yet they end up having sex.
This, by many, has been seen to be classed as rape. Others call it emotional abuse. The aspect of it that makes me the most uncomfortable is that I accepted this as normal behaviour at 17 and even defended these actions. I had not had much experience and so I took it as gospel that this was normal behaviour in a sexual relationship. It makes me very uncomfortable that, now I can see the extent of the abuse, young girls, like I was, will think this is normal behaviour and then if it happens to them they won't realise it's abuse.
I don't know how E. L. James, the author, and Arrow books, the publishers, could allow this to be printed for millions of people to read. They had an opportunity to teach young people the appropriate behaviour in a situation such as this, but instead they violated their positions and chose to print this abhorrent scene. This has changed my perspective of the books and I find myself questioning every action Christian takes.
I know many people may tell me to take this with a pinch of salt as, after all, it's just a book. but to me it's not just a book. These books have the power to influence thousands of young people and they may now think that this is normal behaviour but it is not. If you;re partner loves you then if you say the things that ana does in this situation then they will stop immediately and take things at your pace. For me this scene is normalizing rape and I am disgusted by it.
Let me know your opinions on not only this scene but the books as a whole in the comments
LMR
I read the entire franchise of 'Fifty shades' when I was 17 and I have to say I was completely hooked. Everything about it intrigued me and I completely loved it. At that time I saw many people talking about rape related to the books and I used to defend 'Fifty Shades'. I couldn't see where they were coming from, Ana and Christian consented to each other and to me that was it. Rape didn't occur as there was consent involved, a very black and white issue, case closed, right? Wrong.
I'm not suggesting that every sexual occurrence in these books is rape, for me it only happens once throughout the novels. I re read the books recently as the second film is due to be released early next year and I wanted to revisit the story so I had it fresh in my mind for the movie. There is one point in the second book, 'Fifty Shades Darker', that made me feel deeply uncomfortable. *spoilers ahead*
Earlier in the evening Christian had allowed Ana to touch him for the first time, whilst asleep Christian has one of his nightmares and Ana rushes to him to comfort him. When he awakes Christian starts to initiate sex and Ana responds but then says 'Christian.... Stop. I can't do this'. She says this 'urgently' and even physically pushes him away from her. Christian responds by asking what's wrong but he doesn't stop his actions. He starts to kiss her neck and so Ana says 'No, please. I can't do this, not now. I need time, please.'. This is where it gets even more uncomfortable for me. At this point the reader can sense how desperate Ana is for Christian to stop what he's doing and he's already ignored this. Ana still doesn't want to have sex and so Christian emotionally manipulates her into having sex with him. Up until this day Ana hasn't been allowed to touch him and Christian knows how much she wants to. So Christian asks Ana to touch him whilst they have sex. Christian uses this to manipulate her into having sex with him; she clearly did not want to enter into intercourse with him before this point yet they end up having sex.
This, by many, has been seen to be classed as rape. Others call it emotional abuse. The aspect of it that makes me the most uncomfortable is that I accepted this as normal behaviour at 17 and even defended these actions. I had not had much experience and so I took it as gospel that this was normal behaviour in a sexual relationship. It makes me very uncomfortable that, now I can see the extent of the abuse, young girls, like I was, will think this is normal behaviour and then if it happens to them they won't realise it's abuse.
I don't know how E. L. James, the author, and Arrow books, the publishers, could allow this to be printed for millions of people to read. They had an opportunity to teach young people the appropriate behaviour in a situation such as this, but instead they violated their positions and chose to print this abhorrent scene. This has changed my perspective of the books and I find myself questioning every action Christian takes.
I know many people may tell me to take this with a pinch of salt as, after all, it's just a book. but to me it's not just a book. These books have the power to influence thousands of young people and they may now think that this is normal behaviour but it is not. If you;re partner loves you then if you say the things that ana does in this situation then they will stop immediately and take things at your pace. For me this scene is normalizing rape and I am disgusted by it.
Let me know your opinions on not only this scene but the books as a whole in the comments
LMR
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