Anger. A feeling I have on a daily basis, you know that feeling you get when you're about to explode because you're so angry? The bubbling knot you have in your stomach? I wake up with that feeling everyday, most days.
This might be because I keep my feelings to myself most of the time. So if something annoys me I keep it to myself, bury it and then just push more hurt and anger on top of it. I do this for two reasons. The first is that I'm a people pleaser, I hate it when people don't like me I have a chronic need for people to like me. The second is that people won't think my feelings are valid. For example the other day I got annoyed and spoke to my friends about it. Instead of being in my side or at least comforting me they labelled it a 'miscommunication' and disagreed with everything that I said. Yes, if I am being over the top maybe suggest I could be misconstruing things, but at least acknowledge the way that I'm feeling. This is why I keep things to myself as when things like this happen it gets me even more annoyed and I feel alienated.
Things have happened in my personal life that aren't great but I feel like putting all of the blame on that is the cowards way out. Due to the fact I hold onto most of my feelings and don't let them out I am in this constant cycle of anger that I can't seem to shift. Have any of you been here before? Do you have a suggestion as to how I can open up, I don't tend too and it is very hard for me too. I am just fed up with feeling so negative all of the time.
This might be because I keep my feelings to myself most of the time. So if something annoys me I keep it to myself, bury it and then just push more hurt and anger on top of it. I do this for two reasons. The first is that I'm a people pleaser, I hate it when people don't like me I have a chronic need for people to like me. The second is that people won't think my feelings are valid. For example the other day I got annoyed and spoke to my friends about it. Instead of being in my side or at least comforting me they labelled it a 'miscommunication' and disagreed with everything that I said. Yes, if I am being over the top maybe suggest I could be misconstruing things, but at least acknowledge the way that I'm feeling. This is why I keep things to myself as when things like this happen it gets me even more annoyed and I feel alienated.
Things have happened in my personal life that aren't great but I feel like putting all of the blame on that is the cowards way out. Due to the fact I hold onto most of my feelings and don't let them out I am in this constant cycle of anger that I can't seem to shift. Have any of you been here before? Do you have a suggestion as to how I can open up, I don't tend too and it is very hard for me too. I am just fed up with feeling so negative all of the time.
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